I used to do it all. I’d work late hours to keep on top of everything in my fulltime job, and then in my spare time I would create training programs for my business, deliver free workshops, write blog posts, be with my family, and catch up with people in the coaching industry so that I could get my name out there and stay in the loop.
Everything would get done, I’d get to bed in the wee hours of the morning, have 5-6 hours of sleep and friends and colleagues would say “How do you do it all?”
I would be constantly exhausted, everything would get done, and people would still say “How do you do it all?”
Then, one day earlier in the year, I cracked. I was exhausted. I really couldn’t do it all. And so I chose one thing to focus on in my spare time, remained focused and got it done. I also accepted that I couldn’t do it all, and I slowed down. If I wanted to watch the latest Marvel movie with my family instead of blogging, so be it. No guilt. It’s ok
Someone recently said to me “You should be spending more time on social media building your profile” My response was quite interesting and unexpected: “Actually, I have a set of goals and I am not doing anything about that until I know how it fits in with my goals because I am focusing on the one thing on my list, and taking care of myself”. The old me would have taken the feedback onboard, fitted it all in, and got less sleep. Not so the new me.
If, like me, fitting it all in is leading you to feeling exhausted and and as though you are not enough, perhaps the following questions might be useful:
- Why must I fit it all in?
- What emotions are leading to me insisting that I fit it all in? (For me, I think it was sacrifice)
- What requests can I make that would help me find time to take care of myself?
- What would help you to feel comfortable with not doing it all?
2 thoughts on “You Don’t Have to Fit It All In”
You have posed some interesting questions I need to ask myself. Need to reflect on that. I think I worry to much about what people think.
Thank you so much for taking the time to comment. I can relate to worrying about what other people think. “What will other people think?” was a mantra in our house growing up and it has taken a lot of effort for me to have that as less of a mantra. It still creeps in. One thing that helped me was learning that other people will have their opinions and they are opinions, not true facts. I can choose what I do with those opinions and sometimes ignoring them is useful. The other thing is that I think many of us are trained to operate from sacrifice, where we give of ourselves in a way that depletes us. Sometimes choosing to operate from service, where we share ourselves in a way that nurtures all parties (including ourselves) can be a useful choice. My default, I think, is to operate from sacrifice. It has taken effort to deliberately choose service and I am not always successful in doing so.